To kill with a happiness

What a concept it would be to kill with kindness, yet it sometimes appears that people believe that they can kill with kindness. There is a lack of friendliness towards other human beings that often is quite depressing. Yet, on Sunday, while at work, I witnessed a random act of kindness. This lady.. she had no relation with this young man and still found it in her heart to reach out and give a kindness to a random human being. Because it was through drive thru... she did not meet, did not see, and did recieve a thank you from this young man. In fact only 3 people witnessed her act: myself, her, and the young man. She did not do this to accept some award, she did it just because she wanted to do something for someone else.

This lady came to my window (i work drive thru) and I told her her total. She then procceded to ask me what the car behind her owed at the window. I was very confused but I told her their total. She then said I want to pay for theirs and also mine. I thinking hey.. maybe she knows them.. thats fine by me. When the young man came up to my window, he had his hand out ready to pay. I told him that they lady in front of him paid for his meal and he was very surprised. Throughly happy none the less, yet surprised. Then looking at this man I realized that they didnt look like they even knew eachother. One appeared to be of really high class, while the other appeared to have been around the block a few times and probably have had a hard life. This random act of kindess hit me and I wish that more people exercised this. Heck I even admit that I could use with some practicing of it.

Saturday...

Saturday, the marching band (which I am in) we went to Ohio County for a competition. This, for all who do not know, is where many marching bands get together and perform. We are scored on our performance and placed for awards. We are a very small band, yet we have a large school. Therefore we have a few problems competing with the other bands in our class. We are a band of 69 and they are bands of 120. Really is not good for us.
However, we performed twice and I did great both times :).
In our performance I have a solo and both times I did great. I did not mess up even though I was really nervous. I am so proud of myself and I can't wait until this next weekend to get another shot at it!!!!!
:))))))

John Donne... love him!

Let not thy divining heart

Fore think me any ill

Destiny may take thy part

And may thy fears fulfill;

But think that we

Are by turned aside to sleep

They who one another keep

Alive ne’er parted be

But this, all pleasures fancies be;
If ever any beauty I did see,
Which I desired, and got,
'twas but a dream of thee.

Thy sins and hairs may no man equal call ;
For, as thy sins increase, thy hairs do fall.

These are three things that are written by my favorite poet John Donne.

In my eyes.... he is an absolute GENIUS!!!!!!!!!!!

Necklaces

Necklaces are interesting pieces of jewlery...
They can be long... they can be short... you can sometimes lose them....they can be meaningful.
Sometimes it is a jambled mess... knots on top of knots.
The only way to work out those knots.... to slowly pick at it knot by knot.
If you pull too hard and too fast.. then it will break.
You slowly have to work through it.
Some knots are harder than others... it takes lots of time to get them worked out.
Sometimes you have to ask for help. Some knots are just too big for one person to handle.
But, if you keep working at it..... eventually, everything will be all right.

So how's your life?






(I hope you understand the true meaning here)

Bugs

Sometimes it is so hard to trust something. At first you put all of your faith into something, only for little insects to attack all your beliefs and eat away at it until its just about gone. Why is that when we are little, everything is so simple. Someone says "Hey this is real" and your reply is "Okay!" You belive in it whole heartedly without once second guessing that person. Then as you get older one little word or one little event can make you second guess EVERYTHING. You wonder what is true, what isn't true. You wonder who do I trust, who is unsafe to trust. Who should I follow, and who should I not follow? Who can I give my love and heart safely to, and who will break it?
I think this infestment of bugs come froms interaction with others. It typically all starts when we go to school. We start to gain a better understanding of things, we learn how to analyze things, and learn that people lie. The biggest factor... lies. We learn that people lie and that you cant always trust everything. Then we analyze to try to figure if there are truths or lies in the events or explanations set before us. We incorporate analysis into everything that we think about. So we start to doubt everything and trust... it becomes something that is hard to come by.

Lollipops :(

Do you ever have those days that you just feel.... there? You just go through the motions and don't really take in what all is going on around you. You feel unimportant... and unnoticed. You have people asking if you are okay, but you still feel alone.
All of this is because of one affecting event, or one out of the way comment given to you. Typically this is given to you by someone at home. Your mom, your dad, your sister, your brother; they have such amazing contol over what you mood is.
Sometimes you want something so bad that you just cant stand it. You put it in action and it all seems to be coming together just the way that you saw it, the way that you want it to be. Then someone says something.... and your picture just crumbles away. It is ripped from your hands like a lollipop from a small child. All you can think about is that lollipop, you want that lollipop and you will do anything possible to get it back. But that other person, they have different plans. You aren't getting it back, they are not going to let you have it, they aren't going to let you even see it. You know that eventually it will pass, and that lollipop won't be as appeasing. Yet at that moment, there isn't anything else in the world that can distract you from it.

So lesson learned, don't get attached to a lollipop.

Labor Day Weekend

This weekend I went to St. Louis to visit my grandparents. We had a bunch of fun and did a lot of stuff. We, my grandmother and I, made my sadie hawkins shirt. We, my grandmother, my mother, and I, made my Great Grandmother a quilt. We had a great time and it was nice to get away, for work was not possible from another state :)))
However, there was some sadness to the weekend. My father, whom has diabetes, had to go to the VA doctor. To this we found out that his liver level had increased. My father does not drink or do drugs... so the only reason that this could be happening, is the medication that is supposed to be helping his diabetes be controlled. This makes me very worried for my father. I love my father. He has done so much for me and I treasure him so much. I dont know what I would do without him.. and worry about anything that could possibly take him from me.

I love you dad...

blah blah

Have you ever had that relationship that you thought was just perfect. Felt that you were completely in love with them.. thought hey! this could possibly last past until next year even! Then things start to happen. You have a fallingout. You dont seem to feel the same for them anymore, so you break it off. You want to be friends and thats all, but we all know that 'just being friends' doesnt ever work. Then all is fine.. you feel like you can breath. Your no longer in that suffocating relationship and freedom is yours.

Then your parents butt in. They just absolutely LOVE that boy and they wished that you would get back together. They talked to him last night and he misses you. You should get back together. Give him another chance to give you that spark....

What they dont realize.... The match is soaked in water.